The Computer Obsolescence Prevention Society is a group of four vintage computers. The group consist of Bob Bell, Bluster Blaster, Curt 286, and Chippy. Due to their lack of limbs, it is unknown how they have been moving around since they are occasionally seen in different areas. Their first appearance was in Reality 2.0, where they are responsible for maintaining various aspects of the eponymous Reality 2.0., but are apparently unaware of Reality 2.0.'s true nature. During Sam and Max's first meeting with the C.O.P.S., they give the two an extra pair of goggles for Max along with a chip needed to access Reality 2.0. After Sam and Max destroy Reality 2.0., the C.O.P.S. continue to cooperate on various other software projects such as Prismatology, which was featured in the Episode 5. Sam and Max later acquire a magical talisman from them by losing a game of tic-tac-toe against Bluster Blaster. In Season Two, they operate a car shop called Pimp Le Car, offering useful car upgrades (they no longer do this in Episode 3) for the Desoto in exchange for Sam and Max's help with their latest projects. The C.O.P.S. have various speech impediments which they get around by having different members handle different parts of conversations; as such, conversations with the C.O.P.S. are always with all four at the same time. In Episode 5, they help Jimmy Two-Teeth nurse his injured son back to health, but are unsuccessful. Sam later helps Chippy beat Specs in a music playing contest. In Season 3, the C.O.P.S. move into the Desoto and now help Sam and Max in their cases. Bluster Blaster leaves the group and is replaced by the Crime-Tron, who later leaves the C.O.P.S. and goes on a date with Bluster Blaster. Bob serves as an in-car phone while the Crime-Tron is used for processing clues (it is unknown what Curt and Chippy do). In Episode 3, Sam behaves rudely towards the C.O.P.S. following the theft of Max's brain and even threatens to shoot the Crime-Tron if she doesn't locate Max's brain soon enough, causing Bob, Curt, and Chippy to protest against his actions. In Episode 5, they help the other characters figure out a way to stop Max, who has turned into a giant monster; however, they have their sights on destroying Max rather than trying to return him to normal, to Sam's dismay.
Bob is an automated telephone with a voice and vocabulary reminiscent of both movie trailer voice-overs and automated hotlines. He and Curt are the most vocal of the C.O.P.S. In Season 1, he and the the C.O.P.S. have been in charge of running Reality 2.0 and later take part in Prismatology. During Season 2, he and the C.O.P.S. opened up a car shop, Pimp Le Car, adding features after participating in driving minigames that would aid Sam and Max on their cases or add decals just for shooting/hitting certain objects. In Season 3, he and the C.O.P.S. now live in the Desoto, acting as an in-car phone.
Bluster Blaster is an arcade machine resembling that of Sinistar. His speech is limited to very short and easy phrases spoken with excessive emphasis. Because he's the largest member of the C.O.P.S., he usually carries their things in his token case. In Episode 6, after Sam intentionally loses a game of Tic-Tac-Toe against him, he gives Sam and Max the talisman that they wanted. In Season 2, following the opening of Pimp Le Car, he becomes mellow and confused after he has an accident testing the S.O.L. antenna prior to Episode 3, resulting in him talking in a disorientated voice. It is revealed in Episode 2 that Bluster Blaster was originally created by young Sam. Between Seasons 2 and 3, Bluster Blaster (who is now talking normally again) leaves the C.O.P.S. to join Bosco on a trip to Las Vegas and help him count cards. Unfortunately, he was thrown out because he counted them out loud. He was discovered in the harbor during Episode 4, revealing that he was meant to deliver a letter to Momma Bosco. Because he is alone, he is forced to speak in longer phrases and sentences. He has expressed that he never wants anything to do with Bosco again and that his time with the C.O.P.S. is over. Much to Curt's dismay, he and the Crime-Tron are now seeing each other.
Curt looks most like an Osborne 1. He uses a synthetic voice similar to that of Stephen Hawking, which has some peculiarities such as explicitly pronouncing every "-" (as "hyphen"). He often uses difficult technical terms. He and Bob are the most vocal of the C.O.P.S., with Curt doing the thinking and concluding. He has, since Season 3, been seeing the Crime-Tron. It is unknown what he does during his time in the Desoto. Curt was understanding, albeit dismayed, when she left him for Bluster Blaster, stating "I only want her to be happy."
Chippy is a Pong home console system (though What's new, Beelzebub? shows him to be capable of holding a Mimesweeper cartridge). His speech is limited to various beeping sounds (which the other members of the C.O.P.S. can understand), but Curt, at one point, remarks that he is usually swearing. For the most part, Chippy holds no real value in the team outside of his pinging and beeping. In Season 1, he creates a chip for Sam and Max that will allow them to access Reality 2.0. He only really comes to the spotlight during his musical duel with Specs. It is unknown what he does during his time in the Desoto.
The Crime-Tron is a vintage printer/scanner that Sam finds in the sewer. She joined the C.O.P.S. during Season 3 after Sam puts her in the Desoto and introduces her to them. She is the only member to have no method of speech or interaction outside what she is meant to do. During Episodes 1 and 3, Sam would use her to process clues they found. At one point, Sam threatens to shoot her if she doesn't reveal where Max's brain is, resulting in the other members of the C.O.P.S. protesting against his actions. She became Curt's girlfriend for a while, but later left him for the Bluster Blaster. In Episode 5, she leaves the C.O.P.S. and goes on a date with Bluster Blaster. Her nametag says her name is Carol.